So sick

... he used to send me songs when he would come home from the police academy
we would chat online until he had to go to sleep
His song for me was Marios "Shes it"
It was about that chick that moves into your building and u know that she is the girl for you... the one you wont share with your boys... and all that.. lol
our other song was Ushers rendition of Luther's "Superstar"
And our special ringer on each others phone was "Naked"...


this is torture man... pure torture... its crazy because on saturday i had a nervous breakdown and started begging him to come back and speak to me just to say bye... and i had a dream that we were at his funeral and he climbed out of the casket and walked towards me but i ran away from him because I was so scared...

i hope he tries to speak to me again...


im going to keep begging until he does....


...signing off with a smile*